Thursday, June 23, 2005

Barbecued Plover

That Jerry Della Famina is such a funny guy! I mean, East Hampton canceled its Fourth of July fireworks to protect federally threatened piping plovers nesting on the beach, and they forgot to tell Jerry Della Famina, a famous and important celebrity ad man. This was a major inconvenience because Jerry Della Famina always throws a Fourth of July party at his beach house so 500 of his closest friends can watch the fireworks.

This year he had just sent out the invitations when someone – a reporter, probably – broke the bad news to him. What did this funny man quip in response?

"We'll still have it," he said, "but we'll be serving barbecued piping plover. I hear it tastes like chicken."

Barbecuing a federally threatened species! That’s too much! But I don’t blame him. I really really hate it when my parties are disrupted because my local government is trying to protect a threatened species.

According to the New York Times:

Federal regulations impose a fine of up to $10,000 for disturbing the tiny birds and prohibit launching fireworks within three-quarters of a mile of a nest.

I wonder if the Della Famina party qualifies as a disturbance?

1 Comments:

Anonymous Anonymous said...

Good for him. Any bird that requires this much assistance to survive just wasn't meant to be. Shutting down beaches to protect a bird because it is so inept it breeds in the tracks of cars is ridiculous. You want an issue to fight for? How about adequate schools for all our children. But no, this miniscule bird is FAR more important than the educational future of our children. Give me a break. FORGET THESE STUPID BIRDS. They are eaten for food in other countries. Let it go, and find something else far more valuable to spend your wealth and endless time on.

6:30 PM  

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